The Last Piece I Will Ever Write

I call this piece the last piece I will ever write, not because it's the last piece I will ever write but because it's the last piece I will ever...
Right! From the start I sought to chase my whims lusting for a thirst I seeked to quench, never thought that fate is what we make of it but in peace I fought to rest..
My mind on adages and quotes a thousand years before my time, my only crime, being naive so I covered my shame in bliss while these ignorant thoughts broke bread ready for a feast..
See these streets became my teacher, no roof or doors I saw class in every glance, mistook luck for chance and now I rant my sorrows to those who would pay to prey on my emotions while listening to tales from way back in the day when my hair was long and my teeth were still strong,  the thrills rode my mind to reform, conform, deform till I aspired to become..
But what if am wrong...
Am I really wrong to quest for desires I cannot achieve, so why did they say to dream is to believe, survival is for the naive, you show weakness if you forgive...
I heard the sky is the limit so I dawned my cape, that superman thing, and I thought to fly the skies, beyond the clouds so high, the wind in my eyes a reality check and so I kept on falling, falling fast into oblivion, my thoughts and prayers were to God to send His legion, but a sinner's prayers are like noise to His ears, so I bit my tongue till my words bled in faith...
But who knew lust was a man made invention, circumstantial evidence pointed with no due intention, grasped at the clouds but the rains were all tears, their smiles all frowns my deepest fear...

Those who cheered, behind my back stabbed me, they who prayed with me fought hard to stop me, friends indeed I thought to myself, but in need I learned where not to turn when I need help...

Sounds like a plan when in my head, but from my lips it's not the same,

The shame of being sane but when all alone my mind begged for a bullet to end me, but these course floor coverings walked me to the reality of every step..

Treading carefully on calm waters my only mistake, so now I seek enlightenment for my clouded view, from where I stand I seek to return to a life renewed..

The ghosts still walk with me, their souls call for me, their eyes stare at me..

Seems like my ears can't see what my eyes listen to, the deceit smells like garbage sweet and saltied with hugs from a friend turned foe..

But who cares for the past is gone.. I lost the road on my way home...